To Stick or To Break ?

Could not help but post it here. Nothing great to share but something which is making me wonder. 3 of my friends, in a row, broke the news of their marriage being no more. Dead ! Parted their ways with their respective husbands. Isn’t 3 a big number and on top of that getting all 3 just in 30 days ? What surprised me is

-All 3 news are of separations.
-All 3 love marriages!
-All 3 marriages were not even a year old !
Do you believe what you just read or it’s just pretty normal and I’m giving it the not-so-required importance ?
Does this dying of marriage (read:relationship) in infancy relates to women being independent today ? That she doesn’t require a man to be with her or support her for the sake of society norms ? OR because men are not so very keen to nurture the relationship with time and love and are busy running after their careers? OR The world is becoming a place where we will only find 9-5 relationships and the people in the form of programmed robots (read:workaholics and ambitious) ?
My personal experience: me and the hubby dearest fight with each other quiet a lot of times like any other normal couple. And we say the meanest things to each other at that time which also includes packing bags and parting ways. But it’s just the matter of that moment..soon the storm settles down and we realize that this is one thing we can’t do-separate ! Marriage like any other relationship has ups and downs and its between two people who can make it work by adjusting and compromising a little bit and enjoying the differences amongst each other. I also agree that if at all the individuality is getting harmed in saving a marriage then I think the decision has to be taken for sure.A man and a woman, both of them should get the required space to maintain the bit which identifies who they individually are rather than changing the personality totally just for the sake of keeping the marriage !
I think there are 3 types of people:
One who drown themselves so much in work or family so that they don’t get time to even think about their marriage.
Second who just break off if they feel they are not happy with their marriage.It’s just that we have this option of parting our ways in marriage so we easily opt for it whereas in other relationships we don’t have any lawful term called “divorce” which will allows us officially to put a full stop..so we continue being into those relationships ! How fair is that?
Third, who will do whatever it is required to make their marriage work !!
Don’t we need more 3rd type of people???I don’t say getting married is important..it’s an individual choice…but being into marriage and moving a bit to make it work is important-for both partners !!
On the lighter note: This is my 100th post !

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27 thoughts on “To Stick or To Break ?

  1. so true and honest post …I agree we need more of 3rd types but these days stress is making it difficult and hence are left with a choice so simple.(DIVORCE)

  2. Congrats on the 100th post! Re the topic, I higher divorce rates probably have to do a bit more with women realising they can be independent & don't 'need' their husbands. I mean, in the west, divorce rates are high. However, that is not the sole factor…I guess work probably plays a part too. Too much of work = high stress = not being able to put up with relationship stressors = divorce.

  3. First of all, congrats on ur 100th post! :)Back to the topic, those r some terrible news.Dunno wat's happening, it seems like a trend now…sheeshhh… it's making me nervous. Even 2 of my cousins got separated. few yrs back. One was love marriage and other arranged.I'm nt married yet but very much in love with a person for 8 years and counting… 🙂

  4. @Sweet Nothings: Yeah, we resort to the simplest ever way in all problems.But remember the old saying that we have grown up hearing–Short-cuts will always land you in problems and long-cuts,though difficult,will take you to the right destination.

  5. Congratulations on 100th post!Oh! 3 friends but I guess sometimes separation is the best than being in a loveless marriage. Also, at times stress plays a part too and not to forget infidelity.

  6. @Elegant Chic: Thankuuu :)Yeah, don't what's happening these days with relationships.. And hey someone's in love there…heheh..I'm really happy for you sweetie 🙂 I wish you many many years to count ahead in life…!!Hugs 🙂

  7. @Sols: Yeah, I was thinking that no one mentioned the I word yet ! Infidelity also plays a major role in the breaking of…Point..not worth to carry on in loveless marriage..but why let it reach to that extent ? Why not work out thing at earlier stage,no ?

  8. Shocking factor was love marriages broken down in less than one year…maybe all immatured love marriages…Happens.. Bollywood and media creates a fantasy world these days where infatuations are termed as real love…Sad, indeed…

  9. Hey Nu, I wouldn't quite agree when you ask if we need the 3rd type more. Doing 'whatever it takes' to keep a marriage together isnt applicable in all cases. This reminds me of your post on 'Ladies Special'. Do you think Pooja (Harsh Chaya's wife in the serial) should make the marriage work? Under circumstances that she is in, the marriage should end. With some couples the scene is like 'paani sar ke upar chala gaya hai', so its quite difficult. Another thing I thing is that, nowadays we have such inflated egos which hamper most of our relationships. Sad na? 😦

  10. Very relevant post ! we need 3rd type of people, my take is think 100 times before marriage, after amrriage work hard to make it work and think 300 times before breaking it.

  11. Congrats on the 100th. Here's wishing you 100s more :)I agree to an extent with G. I think relationships are breaking more because couples are no longer ready to 'suffer' for the sake of society, something which was quite prevalent some years back. But yes, we are a rather impatient generation that is not willing to wait and sort things out.

  12. @Vinz: Yes,I think people take this 'puppy-love' way too seriously and before giving it a thought get into a serious commitment. And when they realize they have only one option left-separation !

  13. @G: No not at all ! I won't expect people like 'pooja' go to any extent and prove their marriage right. By 3rd type I mean both partners preparing to compromise a bit on each side and making it work.. That's how I think you,me and all do..ain't we :)Ego ? yes, very true ! Can't help but tone them down a bit,yeh ?

  14. @Meira: Yay !! Thank yous..as long as I have readers like you I'll have more and more posts 🙂 Yes, the generation thingie comes and the differences in 'now' and 'then' are evident. How nice it would be if we would have a mix of both generations !

  15. Sorry, for not wishing u earlier…BELATED HAPPY BIRTHDAY..ish i could parcel a bouquet to u :)secondly, congrats on ur 100th postCheers ***Glasses click****wat say?

  16. now coming to the blog..i find its plain irresponsible…marriage aint a joke, try the breaking patching up..blah blah when u r dating or during courtship..thats what its meant for…and then when u r serious, u finally tie the knot…u finally decide to stick around, no matter what!! phew!! wats wit this generation?? im glad i havent come across any friends are r divorcing..oh wait, yeah there is one…but wait, its a live-in…so im still okay with that!! they didnt get married, till they were completely sure.But divorce? wat is with people?? is it the in thing to do these days!! crazy nuts!!

  17. @Rush: I know what you mean to say.Even I'm shocked and hence posted it here. It's really saddening to see people easily quitting on relationships in a jiffy. Barring some cases,which are genuine,rest of them are just plain and simple fad to break-up !Hey thanks girl for the wishes and the cheers..Which one ? I would prefer screwdriver 😉 What about you ??? ;P

C'mon,out with it,right here :)

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