Friendship..Dosti..Yarii..etc

Every person has a best friend in life..sometime or the other. Some have the privilege of having friends as long as their existence in this world..right from the kindergarten days to family making days…or may be some that you come across in your teenage days and then these friends stick with you through the thick and thin no matter where you are or what you are…the friendship matures..the friends who are in touch even in old age…you may get really close in your old age too..making friends in old age is a possibility πŸ™‚

As the rule of life there are very few people who stick to one place,city,house for longer years..why I say as a rule of life since transfers,promotions,job change and the likes don’t let you stick to one place for long…as a result you change schools, you change cities, you change companies or you get married and shift bases and hence you change your friends too..no matter how bold promises we make to our old friends that ‘we’ll be in touch‘ and ‘we would at least meet up once a year‘ etc etc…we do tend to keep the promises back of our mind not necessarily forget !

Specially, when we are parting our ways at the end of the college we get so much sentimental so that we sing friendship songs..we cry,write slam books..exchange gifts..photographs..parties…get-tos and all possible things under the sky which would let us meet our friends once more…before the d-day comes when the departure actually takes place…

Finally you land up in your job and slowly but steadily the new life takes a toll on you takes over your emotions and promises..basically the old person in you and you’re left with the new life and new friends…which is good and you’re enjoying…but unknowingly you leave the old friends behind and sometimes when you remember those good old days you realize how things have changed….how many days have passed by that you haven’t called your buddy from college…of course there are exceptions…but whatever my experience and observation says the friends who land in the same city are the only ones to maintain that bond otherwise most of the times the dynamics change..

How does it all happen?? Do we do it on purpose ? Not at all..why would someone on purpose ignore the best of the friend from college ? But it still happens..and that’s the right time to test the mettle of your relationship…in hard times is when you come to know who really loves you !

When in college or in school or in some organization…when you meet daily.. sometimes 3 times a day and talk on phone almost every hour you are well connected to the person and of course he or she is the closest one that you share your things with…and the relationship is tagged as ‘best friendship’…but the real test is when you are away…out of sight..not meeting for years…only connected to through emails and phone calls-which are also a bit irregular…do you feel the same connection ? The same comfort of sharing anything and everything with the person ?

There are no guaranteed tests that you can put your friends through..but there are certain things which we all need to note…

  • Friendship is a lovely relationship..one has to nurture it and cherish it.
  • It needs understanding and trust as it’s base and the rest of the toppings happen automatically with time.
  • You need to know and understand what’s going on the other side before making any assumptions that the other side is acting smart and hence not contacting or replying or whatever.
  • If something really goes wrong in your relationship never ever bitch about your ex-friend..at least for the sake of old days.
  • Yes, and old adage-A friend in need is a friend in deed.
  • Friendship is to be felt and not be forced.It needs to come from within and from both parties.So,no forcing the other party to be your friends or so.
  • Friends are those who accept you and love you for what you are and not what they want you to be.So someone trying to change your thinking or your entire being-be aware that might not be your friend.
  • Friendship is all about sharing,caring and giving-not snatching,being jealous or dictating.
I was talking to my nappy friend the other day [we have been friends for 25 years now :)] and she was telling me about some nosy relative and she said ‘Relatives should understand na!’ to which my reply was ‘If only relatives could understand they would be named as friends’!!


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10 thoughts on “Friendship..Dosti..Yarii..etc

  1. true true and true :)it is very important to make it a point to keep in touch, its easy as long as you study or work together, but once you part ways(in my case cross oceans) it should never be about who calls/emails first or who calls/emails often, its the call/email itself thats important!

  2. so true. I so yearn to talk to my friends for hours, and I try to keep in touch as much as possible. Friends are the best things, wouldn't want to lose the best ones, you see. Now am going to use this weekend to call my friends πŸ™‚ thanks to your post πŸ™‚

  3. In my experience, the friends in 'closest' proximity are the ones that dont keep in touch as often as they should ! How many times will ignore the ones that will stand us by in search of ones that will just pass us by ! Sigh..!

  4. I am not in touch everyday or every week or even every month with my friends in college but I still feel the same I did when I talk to them..and receive the same vibe from them..Don't say it enough..but I am thankful for the same..

  5. That was so beautifully written, Nu! Oh yes, friendships may last years, survive distances,etc, if we put in the effort :)The points you have mentioned are so sweet and apt.

  6. yes Divi you are first πŸ™‚ YAY and I agree with what you said πŸ™‚ Good for your friends T that you gonna call them this weekend..they gonna bless me :PWhat a thought Kavi,sigh !I'm glad it's the case with you Comfy πŸ™‚ you are lucky :)Thanks Smithu πŸ™‚ Oh G, what happened ? when did I not answer you 😦

C'mon,out with it,right here :)

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