Often you come across people who
want to like to dominate in whichever way they can. Dominate their friends or spouse or siblings.Whosoever they come across. Because that’s what flows in their blood.
I hate it that way. Any body would dislike being treated like having no bran and spine and following someone blindly. But then there are these kind of people too who like to follow. Who think by following any ‘xyz’ person they are doing some good to themselves. I hate it this way too.
I don’t say following someone is bad or not good.Of course we have been taught by our elders to take all the good habits of people we meet with and shoo away the bad ones. But taking someone’s good habit isn’t following the person or is it ?
I had a friend in my b-school who used to just blindly follow what I used to do.I still remember when I had bought 5 subjects notebook the next day she had bought exactly the same type of notebook and audaciously showed it me saying that she also got it and added a lame smile ! Also, I have particular way of writing notes when in class and to my horror she used to compulsorily sit next to me..and she used to copy exactly the way I took down notes..even if that meant using black and blue balls pens for headings and asterisks. Somehow I tried and shooed her away in a polite manner and managed to grab a seat away from her !
This was still easy cause you were just to stay away from a person and that’s not possibly tough ! Ignoring can get a lot easier than running away from a relationship you are deeply involved into.
In the same batch, I became friends with another girl and we were like thick buddies in everything we did.Certainly that did not mean wearing same colour clothes and using same notebooks and opting for same subjects :P. But yes we used to rock as friends and were enough as a gang to enjoy with each other.We thoroughly enjoyed each other’s company. But slowly then I realized that this girl was nothing but was lover or dominance ! She did everything for me by heart but in turn may be she expected that I follow her in whatever she does and thinks.
Instances like if we are discussing something in general…and I would say ‘wow,I just loved it’ snap came the reply that ‘oh please,that’s not the way people dress…that’s so shoddy..it should be this way’..another time..’nice pair..they look good together’..the reply to this ‘what did you like in the guy? He looks so lame..shheeh’…and then I realized..this friendship is not meant for me ! I’m better away from this…adding to this..I didn’t like her criticizing everyone and making this statement..’main hoti to aisa karti ya aisa nahi karti’ …
this ‘MAIN’ thing at least out me off and we certainly went far far away from each other by heart..which no one could understand why..for her it was always the richness,the class,the style and her opinion that mattered ! And for me what matters is the person and respecting the differences..of course I’m not playing any saint here…I too don’t like that people disagree with but doesn’t mean I ask them to shut up and follow me totally..I always think that differences should be respected and that’s the only way to a healthy relationship… Individuality has to be given priority !
This ‘follow me‘ business is totally a no-no…I mean it’s a not a twitter or a blog to follow….it’s a relationship !! But alas.blogger calls it ‘follow‘ and the twitter calls it ‘follow me‘ !!
I’m sure you must have got these kind of a friends in your school or college or at work…hai na ?