Dependency

How dependant are you on your spouse? Okay let me ask this first.

Do you like to be called dependant on your spouse at all?

Is there anything wrong on being dependant [emotionally & financially-both or either] on your spouse and/or accepting that in public?

I get a stare or a shake of head when I commit to the fact that I’m emotionally dependant on H.

There could be lot of friends that I have who are close to me but finally it’s H whom I need to lean my head on and express what’s bothering me or upsetting me. I need him badly to take me out of this whinning mode and cheer me up. Of course there are special friends in life with whom a quick chat/talk peps me up but no one can replace what H can do to my moods and the way he can soothe me and pep me up or even share the moments of happiness with me.

So there! Even if there are people who think that being emotionally and/or financially dependant on your husband is not the in-thing in today’s world, so be it ! Who cares what fashion or trend dictates these days? I know what I want from life and I’m getting it so who are you miss/mister to judge whether I’m going in the right direction or not?

Today,I know H for 10 years and he is my best friend. And we both are happy the way our relationship has shaped up. And now that I’m a full time home maker I don’t mind calling myself dependant on him financially too.

Why people have to judge others according to their standards? huh !Total time pass people these are,I’m telling you !

 

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78 thoughts on “Dependency

  1. Absolutely! I think I am emotionally dependent on him – just as he is on me 🙂 We both complete each other 🙂

    I think one would tend to be emotionally dependent on one’s spouse – after all, we ar sharing our lives with each other, aren’t we?

  2. THis is so bad, my blog roll says 2minutes and there are already 2 comments

    how sad is that now .. and I am still THIRDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

      1. nooooo i am not kicking you out i am happy with the SECONDddd one above the third is fine with me … 🙂

        but seriously its said 2 minutes and when i ame here there were already two comments 🙂

          1. THank youuuuuuuuuuuuuu i can depend on you then ki mere saath na insaafi nahin hogiiiiiiii 🙂 yayyyyyyyyyyy

            mujhe mera hak milna chahiye

            insaaf milna chahiye

            ooohh am i going toooo far with this he he heeh

  3. i better write something before u disqualify me …

    YEs i am so dependent on her for sure and same as she is on me Well i hope .. hold on i got to ask and then confirm that later on 🙂 he hehehee

    1. you don’t have to be experienced to comment on the post sags 😦 you can put your views…

      and moreover this comment came in because last post also you just claimed first and went away…sob sob sob 😥

  4. So true… Some people have no work but to asses everyone on their meaningless standards… Some people really need to realize that they better mind their own business….

  5. वनातला कुठलाही वृक्ष
    एखाद्या दुसर्या वृक्षाच्या फांदीत गुंतला ,
    अथवा
    त्यावर आयुष्यात कधी रेलला ,
    तर
    बाकीच्या वृक्षांना काय वाटतं
    याची फिकीर करत नाही …..
    सळसळत्या कुज्बुज्णार्या पानांकडे
    आणि
    एकामेकाला खुणावणार्या फांद्यांकडे
    लक्ष द्यायचं नसतं………..

  6. It is called a marriage..that means you stand together as a unit no matter what..which means you depend on each other to carry you through your difficult times.

    If people raise eyebrows at that..they really need to look at what marriage is again.

  7. Oh Grr.. I was going to do a post on this and you stole the idea from my head X(.. never mind.. i’ll just write a mini post here.
    ME:oh were you..sowwwy 😀 yes yes do a mini post here I don’t mind at all 🙂

    I am way too dependent on Mint. And no, nobody raises an eyebrow. When it comes to emotional dependence, I think it is the most natural thing. Nobody can comfort me the way he can.
    ME:you’re right…and good that people around you are sane 🙂

    But I am talking about the other kind of dependence that I have a problem with. I can’t function without him on a daily basis. I need his assistance even while making lame decisions, travel arrangements, and doing other house hold chores like fixing the fuse. I would like to be more self sufficient and be able to do things on my own. So in this regard, I think being independent works well.
    ME:yeah may be here you can be a little bit independent which is okay..but anyway even if it is like this,it’s still okay, isn’t’ it?

  8. I am emotionally dependent on hubby and my parents and my hubby is emotionally dependent on me. There is nothing wrong in it. But that said, I know that if tomorrow my hubby or parents are not there to support me, I can be totally emotionally independent too!! When you share such a close bond with someone, you are bound to get attached (and dependent) on them.

    1. Aww now that’s such a sweet way to put is CR 😀 A team is absolutely correct 🙂

      Oh thank you so much for the hugs and congrats 🙂 we’re still running behind you though…15 is a coolest number I’ve come across 🙂 YAY to that 🙂

  9. Hmmm what should I say here? Am a lazy bum and if it was not for him, I would be a Sleeping Beauty err Yakshi waiting for an eternity for the alarm to go off! 🙄

    I can’t believe what I just wrote! 😳

    We both are crazily dependant on each other for everything!

    1. LOL Saks…is it that you’re this lazy ? 🙂

      Oh but I believe what you wrote 😉

      I’m so glad to know that there is a couple like ours who are crazily dependant on each other 🙂

  10. Its too early for me to comment on this 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀

    I dont like the idea of being dependent on somebody. I stayed alone for almost 8 years until I got married. and after marriage, I started feeling suffocated with a person roaming around the house 😀 😀 😀 😀

    1. Suffocated!! Vimmuuu don’t you fear your missus? 😀 😀 Do you realize the trouble you’d get into if she gets to read this?! 😀 😀 I am a complete novice in these matters but Vimmuuu if what you’re saying is true then I’ll have to think when I take that final plunge (though it’s a long long long way away) 😀 😀 😀 Anyway, I used to be emotionally dependent on a dear friend but after a bitter experience I’m on my own. I think the dependency should be mutual. It works better that way.

      1. Ajju..for experiences and guidance please don’t stop at Vimmu’s door in this field !!! He is the wrong person for this 😉

        Ask people like us…look at the awesome comments people have left about a relationship…I’m sure you’ll find such a person too in your life 🙂 Don’t forget to invite us though 😉

    2. yeah I know it’s too early for you Vimmu jee 😀

      May be because this is too early you’re not sure and you don’t know the magic of being dependant on your spouse 🙂

      Come back here when you’ll know it… and I’m sure you’ll be nodding in agreement 🙂

  11. I am financially dependent on hubby but I manage my other aspects very well. I learned a long time back that one has to ultimately deal with one’s demons and angels alone. It helped me a lot. I never put my burden on anyone else.

  12. Agree with you wholeheartedly! I’m emotionally dependent on my husband and I have no qualms in saying that. In fact both of us rely a lot on each other emotionally.

    So just dont pay attention to people who stare at you or judge you, Nu. So long as you do what you want to do and it makes you happy, theres no room for any judging whatsoever 🙂

  13. BTW, when I opened my reader in the morning after about a weeklong break..there were some 59 unread posts against your name :roll:. I was a wee-bit short of fainting upon seeing that! Do you have any idea how in the world am I going to clear that backlog?? Why oh why do you guys choose to churn out posts just when I go off on a chotu-motu break?? 😦 😥

    1. oh that…LOL Deeps..I imported the remaining posts from my blogger blog hence the backlog in your reader 😀

      But anyway you haven’t read them so go on and read 😉 one day at time 😉

  14. Yup…absolutely true, I dont think there is anything wrong in being dependent on your spouse and openly admitting it as well.. these things gotta b ‘personal opinion’ and not what the trend is. And after all, its goot to an extent too.. i feel too much independency spoils the charm of the relationship ..

  15. I think it is wonderful that u have an emotionally available husband!! many women r not that lucky! What people forget is that everything is relative..and things are not same for everyone!! it is wrong to impose one’s thoughts/beliefs on someone else.

  16. Well I think the dependency is must…and I think the dependency should be both ways… It makes you feel wanted and you feel the need for your partner.

    and to answer you question I think I am dependent emotionally on my wife

    1. is a must or no I don’t know but it’s always good to have your spouse to depend upon rather look out for people around when you need someone to share things 🙂

      Yes it being two ways makes us feel wanted and comfortable with the ‘dependency’!

  17. I am super dependant on The Dude, so much so, that it actually tells you why i am forever whining when he is not around, because , accept it, life without him around just sucks, not normal 😦

    I agree to the point that one needs to have his/her identity, but seriously, the whole concept of having someone is to be able to lean when you want to, without bothering about anything else!

    Pbbbht to whoever thinks this is not cool :P!

  18. oh yes.. I am totally dependent on K and he is on me!
    We lean on each other during hard times and this gives us the strength to move on and conquer our troubles! 🙂
    Its a lovely feeling too.. I don;t know why people have a problem with it!
    Besides, like DI says – it isn’t like losing one’s identity or something!

    1. oh and its not just during hard times – its all the time – the dependency is a good thing!

      I’m not sure why I’m clarifying this, but anyways… 😀 😀

  19. Hmm…not sure…I’m definitely not financially dependent on anyone at the moment. (That in itself is scary!) And to be honest, I don’t want to be financially dependent on any partner in the future either…hopefully it will be okay. Emotionally, I may be dependent on a couple of people. I don’t think a person can be completely independent even though I tried to do that once upon a time. Realised I can’t be like that! 😛

    By the way Nu, I have been reading your blog…just not commenting as often…will do so from now 🙂

  20. Of course, I am very dependent on S – both financially and emotionally and I’ve no qualms in admitting it. I dont find anything wrong in this equation.

C'mon,out with it,right here :)

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