While chatting with an old pal we arrived at the topic of making babies. So she asked me what do I want? I mean a girl or a boy? Before I could answer she typed in that please don’t tell me that anything is fine…tell me what’s your choice?
This left me thinking and thinking deep at that…first it made me think about her..why is she asking me such a question? Is she ‘I want a boy’ types? And also how do you chose or want a gender of a child? Okay let me reframe it. On what basis do you decide that you want a baby girl or a baby boy? What are the parameters one has to keep in mind to make that choice? Also do you really have this kind of a choice when you think of making babies?
Even today while our educated lot accepts that a girl and a boy is equal and that they don’t do any discrimination in their minds-there still is a pinch of extra happiness when a baby boy is born. Why?
What’s so magical about a boy that isn’t about a girl I ask? I’m a girl and I feel blessed to be born like one. I fortunately hail from the family where neither parents nor grand-parents entered the battle of sexes and discriminated between me and my brother. Even today my dad stands proud to have me as his first child and treated me & continues to treat me in all fairness. Not even once did my grand-mother made an ugly face by the fact that a girl was born to my mother as her first child.
But there is this one incident I would like to mention which is making stories since 30 years in our family. Sounds funny now but if you look deep you’ll find the problem with the mindset.
I was born in Kanpur. Uttar Pradesh any way is quiet generously famous for suffering by the ‘we-want-a-male-child’ syndrome. When I was born and the nurse had brought me out of the maternity room to the group of family members-my dad asked kya hua? To which the nurse very warily exposed me by unwrapping my body to indicate that it was me-a girl. She didn’t even utter the word ladki and very sad facedly handed me over to dad, sigh! It seems that she wasn’t happy at all to see a girl born in our family!
Any way this was way back in ‘80s but what about today? When we have supposedly crossed a decade and reached where everything is fair and equal for everyone? Even in today’s world and era people yearn for a male child. Especially, the ones who proclaim that they’re educated, belong to the high society and are balanced in the head types.
I pity those, really! No I don’t want to change their mindsets and all that stuff or tell them the importance of female and male ratio in our country. I just want them to be honest to themselves. I want them to admit that they want a male child. At least this fact would be hundred times better than the animated lie that they present time and again in front of the public just to prove how non-discriminating they are!
So yes I appreciate my friend’s question what’s my preference. By this she just wanted me to be honest and express my wish without any ifs and buts.