No separate room?

Last week I visited a friend [who is single]. She is Husby’s colleague and we have recently become very good friends. This was the first time I went to her place.

We chatted and chatted and had some nice brown cake and chai to accompany us. The next best thing was when she said let’s go to my room and we climbed the stairs to her room. Her room looks like some amazing place to be. Nothing fancy there but what I loved is-her room has a balcony with an awesome view, it is  a cozy small room with one bed, one table-chair and a book case, plus an almirah of course. There is a fire place in the room [which is non functional] but she has used it creatively. So the overall look of her room in short  ‘perfect  ‘me’ place’ !

It reminded me of my own room back home. When I was living with my parents. My brother had another.It’s been ages I hadn’t thought of my room. But that day M’s room reminded me of not only my room but all those years spent in there. How perfect it sounded then ‘my room’. The posters like ‘enter at your own risk’ and the likes were pasted on the walls. The bed made exactly the way I wanted it to be. The doors closed when I wanted them to be closed. My girls’ gang’s favorite hangout-my room!

Cut to present. I’m married and we have ‘our’ bedroom! Even when people generally look out for new houses [for rent / purchase] they count rooms as in master bedroom, kids’ room, in-laws room, guest room and if it is going to be very rich purchase then you have a maid’s room too. Do we ever think of a separate room for our selves? Like the wife has one room to herself and the husband has another for himself? We don’t!

In a general set up there is no concept of having two separate rooms for a married couple. And logically what’s the need? When you are sharing yourself, your life with your spouse,the room is a big deal!

On the contrary when there are two sisters / two brothers they share the room and so they are kind of used to this concept of ‘sharing’ unless they belong to a very rich family where in every sibling has a separate room,no matter what!

But those who had separate rooms can,may be,relate to what I’m saying,can you?

So am I saying that bachelors / spinsters have an added advantage of having their own room to themselves? Or put in other words-married people don’t have their own separate room? 🙂

Or may be this thought came to my mind only when I visited a single girl’s room after a long while?

Well,I don’t know but just thinking….and missing my ‘separate’ room ,sigh!

No,this isn’t my room,but mine looked somewhat like this 🙂

26 thoughts on “No separate room?

  1. My sis and I always shared a room so it was great when I came to Aus and had my own room! I’ve had difficulty putting up with my ex in my room and it used to be a point of contention due to the way I did thinks v the way he did. If I ever do find a guy, it will be interesting to see how we manage sharing a room!

  2. You know, I wouldn’t mind a room of mine at all:) I don’t want a bedroom of my own, but a room, lined with books, a nice desk, perhaps, some plants, a comfy sofa, a few comfy chairs.. A room that would be my refuge, where I get to hideout, when I want me-time. God! Look what you’ve done with this post:) You’ve made me yearn for this:)

    1. these are the precise thoughts that came running to my head when I was thinking of having my own room 🙂 well lit room with large French windows and lot of books and a large comfortable cushion and me 🙂

  3. I never had a room to myself until my Bro left for hostel. But the real fun of having a room was when I moved to a seperate flat while I was single and working and yes I do miss that phase.

    And Like Smitha I too want a room for myself where I can read, watch TV, keep it the way I want i.e. basically a room where solitude would be my companion and where I cud do whatever I want to! Sigh!

  4. never had a separate room , in hostel it was a dormitory .. and back home shared my room with 2 other cousins the three of us ..

    but We had fun one corner each was OUR own and one common corner he he h ..

    and wow that a clean room Mine never looked that clean EVER…

    1. oh sharing is fun too no doubts on that..but I think this having ‘your own room feeling’ generally sprouts up when we tend to mature…or something like that 😉 I mean just my thought…then we yearn for ‘my space’ ‘my time’ etc….no?

  5. Well.. That sounds something sweet.. A Me room.. To spend Me time 🙂 To pursue our hobbies and to sink in something we love to do like reading or writing or stitching.. Pretty cool..

    1. wow you gave it another dimension merry girl 🙂 pursuing your hobbies! for me it would sketching and crafts 🙂 this all is sounding so much fun!

  6. Like Smitha I too wouldn’t mind a room of my own… with camera equipment, exercising stuff, my books and computer and some favorite peices of furniture…. I think men used to have their ‘den’ or study in the past, my grand fathers did, but mine would be more informal and very well lit… 🙂 Never even thought about this before… But sounds like am amazing idea!

  7. my bro and I shared a room and after that when cousin K came to stay, bro had moved out to hostel, so both of us shared a room 🙂 I wouldnt want a room of my own, prefer having some one around :):) now of course its RD AND R!!!

    waise bhi, in Bombay, you are lucky to even have a bedroom, forget a Separate room 🙂

  8. I had a room of my own back home in Ahmedabad. Being the only child, I didn’t have to share it with anyone! 😉 And it was super fun to have one. Perfect space for some me-time.

    I echo Smitha. I would love to have a room of my own in Bangalore as well. Not a separate bedroom, but somewhere where there would be indoor plants, books, paintings, maybe a fireplace too, and some stuffed toys. A total girlie place for some me-time. Sadly, that is not possible at the moment. We have two rooms at the moment, apart from the living room. One is our bedroom, and the other is the guest bedroom.

    1. but hold that thought close to your heart….whenever you have a big house to yourself [which I’m sure you’ll soon :)] reserve a room aka your den for sure 🙂

  9. The friend’s room sounds so warm and welcoming 🙂
    Not thought of a separate room like that, but I do hv a corner like that – jhoola, facing the balcony and the book shelf just next to it 🙂 Bliss it is!

  10. though we had the option of having separate rooms, I and my sister shared one and made the other guest room. and we loved that! so I don’t mind having a shared room with spouse either 🙂

    1. I guess having shared the room with siblings does make it a habit? I mean you’ve always shared your room with the sibling so sharing it with spouse doesn’t make you miss ‘your’ room 🙂

  11. wow.. this is making me think, what if even had tow rooms after wedding?? :).. i think that will end up being ur study room where u will not want anyone to touch ur things.. this also reminds me of a n architect, who built a house around a tree, the tree trunk just came in between their bed, so wife applied for a divorce. :). this particular house does have two separate rooms and one common bedroom.. 🙂

C'mon,out with it,right here :)

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