Today I’m on leave, an unplanned, non urgent (but important) leave. I was thrilled at the start of the day when I realized no typical rush would fill my morning hours and there would be no ‘reaching to office’, ‘reaching to school’ on time would dance on my mind.
The day began and the first thing I did was to pick my book which is just about to finish, the thought of being able to do the review just today itself gave me that ‘high’ and I was elated.
I read, I did a little cleaning here and there, tended Chirpy to her breakfast, we both read our own books lying side by side on the bed 🙂 directed the cook for lunch and again read books!
Then I watered plants in garden… while I was doing that happily, I realized how important it is for a homemaker to be around and tend to every little thing that is at home, living or non living. I recollected (and realized) how my mother did this all happily all these years and never complained of not doing anything with her life and not having any aim etc etc.
She was always there when we needed her, when her plants needed, to direct the house-help, to serve us warm food on time, to listen to our non stop chatter and to take all our tantrums, to do everything, you know!
I think of myself, in the period when I was not working. And I recall that was a bad phase for me, I could not sit at home and have no schedule at all. That maybe because Chirpy was not born and I was not a mother to cater to her child, but overall I think I’m of the kinds who can’t sit at home. I mean I can’t be a homemaker, I think I would do average in that section but as a professional I’m doing great and I’m loving it.
Did my mother never felt the urge to step out? Never felt that she has to do something out of her life? I wonder and then realize, we were her world and that being around was what she termed as ‘doing something’ and because of that how blessed lives we had! My father never stopped her from picking up a job, ours has always been a very open and freedom oriented family, so she was free to choose her life as she wanted to, and I see that she chose us!
It is a constant dilemma in all women’s mind, I’m sure, to be at home for children or to go out and pursue their careers. Some make it clean with distinct priorities and some do not make clean because of needs and sometimes because of confusion.
I fall in the first category, largely and a minor portion makes me fall in to the need category. The need of money, the need of maintaining the sanity, the need of not losing oneself by losing oneself in the corporate world!
Did you get what I’m trying to say? Well….
All I could recall at the end of my thought process was, our happy garden back then, smiling green plants, lovely blooming flowers and smiling and contended family! Today, even I have a happy garden but that is tended by maali baba, I too have a smiling and happy child but mostly tended by her grandmother!